If only Ben were 51% gay instead of 49%
i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
I've come to the conclusion that the only reason I fucked him was because he reminded me of Seth Rogen.
so my car got towed last night. I didnt know it cost 118 dollars to have a college experience
You're asking the wrong person. I was drunk on nyquil and jager.
Hypothetical question: If a guy wanted to watch you fuck me, would you be willing to take a long lunch break on Wednesday?
Thats gotta be it. Also just found out that the fireworks will fit in the airsoft pistols...we are all gonna die
You just managed to turn Doctor Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.
I think were only still together so we can make each other miserable
You should really look at your snapstory. It has us screaming " MANSION DICK! SUCK IT! FUCK IT!" By the way im currently in a mansion and need you to pick me up
Banging to Billy Joel pandora is like russian roulette. But I made him cum to Let It Be so I we both walked away victors
I've lost every trace of self esteem. Even sneaking a BJ in the coffee room has lost it's luster.
It's one am and you're asking me if you should buy a plane ticket for a booty call.
What use have I for dignity? It just get's in the way of the really fun stuff.
That was the first time ive ever slept with a girl with a q in her name
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