The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion.
He told me his mother taught him that move. What the hell do I say to that?
we started pounding beers an hour ago to celebrate our personal snow day tomorrow. vodka shots for u of i's actual decision are on standby.
Hey fuck you and your taint. I'm just riding a canoe called life, back the fuck off. P.s. I need a ride
I NEVER left your party last night of anyone asks.
Yeah, I didn't wake up handcuffed to my bed either.
What happens at the gay bar stays at the gay bar. Except that I sold my panties for $100. People should know that.
Youre not supposed to get arrested if your parents fly you home for christmas!
True but this has the bonus of them maybe not wanting to fly me home next year, im good with that didnt wanna go in the first place.
Ramen still too hot to eat. Eating it anyway. Stoner girls feel no pain
I woke up and discovered I gave new meaning to the term "pizza pockets" yes it's exactly like it sounds like
we should definitely drink gin again. soon.
My philosophy is thug life and that means never having to say your sorry for stealing drinks off tables
How about we just have a naked taco night instead?
And I made some girl take out the trash, load and unload the dishwasher, swifter, and clean the counters. So don't act like I don't do anything.
Last night when I blacked out, I ate Chef Boyardee. I never want to be that drunk ever, ever again.
He sent me off with a naked dance ending in a meat swing. I don't think I'll be seeing him again.
this is the 3rd time this week I've gone to the liquor store to stock up for the next 2 weeks
Randomize
