dear roomies, would anyone wanna donate the booze they left in the fridge over break to the "your roomies snowed in and all alone" fund?
Either you made a spaghetti vodka smoothie last night, or you puked in the blender.
I always enjoy the bewildered gaze as I buy chips, salsa and beer @ 0745.
She suggested that I come visit her in Europe and hook up with the heteroflexible Korean who sits next to her in class. Polylove is the best love.
You slow clapped the stripper last night.
I GOT A VENDING MACHINE FOR OUR LIVING ROOM
I'm with some lesbians. Somehow I offended them and the Justin Beiber one told me I was fat.
sending him nudies in gran's hospital bathroom. you?
Hot dogs and hydrocodine is NOT the combo of champions
Wait I'm all alone with a guy and his turtle
Ok thats it i need a list. Full names, nicknames, in which frats, with a photo, of all the guys youve hooked up with because three of the same guys is ridiculous
Is there anything more American than getting day drunk and watching Hulk Hogan promos?
Yeah ok. We can maid of honor each other since you don't like my boobs enough to lesbian marry me
I accidentally sent my dad a very explicit Star Wars fanfiction and he replied with "That was great!"
Puke-y regrets or just things-seem-far-away regrets?
Randomize
