your horoscope this morning...very interesting...good luck today
Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
i can hardly tell the difference between falling asleep and passing out anymore
You would get kicked out of the study lounge for being drunk the monday of finals week
He cummed in my mouth, then said he had to go because his best friend broke his foot falling off of a balcony, put twenty dollars in my hand and was gone before I could even swallow...
I just took went to the bathroom and it smelt like blue curococo... I didn't flush yet so head on up if you wanna know what a good night smells like.
I never had a problem I couldn't slut my way out of.
Nothing like a Mormon bachlorette party to make you feel slutty
My bullwhip has saved my life tonight and gotten me laid. I'm gonna be Indiana Jones every Halloween!
Well five day drinking adventure in appreciation of cinco de drinko under the belt, great way to start may
I snapchatted his face mid sex. Needless to say, I don't think I'll ever see him again.
Well to me, someone is not really my friend until we go to a mcdonalds drunk at 4am. It's like a right of passage
He kept asking for nudes so I sent him a picture another guys dick. He called me ruthless.
All I did today was eat pizza and use my vibrator.
twas supposed to be night one of rebound break but it was night one of get sloppy drunk and dance half naked in an ice shack
Randomize
