After he came all over my face, he proceeded to give me a high five. I can't even act upset because I always put myself in these situations. Did I mention D3: Mighty Ducks was playing in the background?
I just creeped all your pictures on Facebook -- it was like I watched you grow up right before my eyes.
after he gave me a diploma for giving him amazing head, getting a regular diploma isnt all that cool.
Just sold a bike on craig's list for 4 four lokos and a 40. How bad do you miss college?
There's nothing I can say to make me pepper spraying you any better
There are now half chewed girl scout cookies plastered to my windshield. Do you know anything about this?
Yes theres a double standard. Get over it. Fuck the critics and go be the slut you were born to be
Until you wake up with a Hustler club stripper in the next room whose nipple you were coerced to lick at Snake & Jake's after breaking up a fight between an Indian and a Filipino, I don't wanna hear about your weird.
just run out there and shit all over the driveway when he comes.. and then point at him
i swear to god if you did anything to my honey bunches ill remove all the oats and shove them up your dickhole then play pinata with my foot to knock them all back out
You have ruined sex with him for me. Now all I think is "boy scout" and I want to go home
Her mom came in and passed out drunk on the floor next to us while she was riding me, "it's all good, she does this all the time" is what she said
Would you paint my ceiling for oral sex?
They weren't kidding when they said "Go Army Strong." Best sex I ever had.
I didn't think you wanted your identity stolen along with your dignity. My mistake.
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