Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
I'm seriously so bored I'm seeing how many rooms I can masturbate in before I get caught.
Four. Poor grandma...
Lesson 1: you can't keep macking on a girl if you get handcuffed
Public safety found my id!
And i can't find my bra so i'm assuming they found my bra with my id which would explain the disapproving tone the lady on the phone had.
He said we were driving the golf cart through the woods screaming 'iceroad truckers' for four hours in the dark
Just saw a denim jacket with the phrase christian cowboy...ridin with the lord under a picture of a cowboy in a sunset. I'm def in mississippi.
Drunkkker than when I told the drag queen she was prettier than me
The stoned girl at the dining hall just handed me a single chicken wing and insisted that she's "unable to procure more rations"
The last thing I remember is singing hotel California with a hobo and asking every bald man I saw if I could touch his head.
He took a picture of me to show his boss why he was late...Is that a compliment or not?
MY DAD KEEPS LIKING PORN LINKS/ALBUMS ON FACEBOOK AND THEY ALL SHOW UP IN MY NEWSFEED
Forget about letting a 70-year-old man suck on my tits for coke... telling my new boyfriend about it was the poor life choice.
I didnt know whether I was going to vomit or orgasm because I was feeling both sensations
got cock blocked by the cops again. two of the cops were the same ones from that t bell incident and they recognized me... they still dont like me
You were arrested in a tiara again... maybe you shouldn’t wear one.
Randomize
