I puked a lego.
Just found my girlfriend's stash of animated Japanese porn
And to think, I actually considered breaking up with her
champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
I imagine my 13 hours of sleep after my 3 day upper bender was similar to Jesus rising from the dead.
i decided i'll just settle for a gay guy who can manage to fuck me like the straight guys do. but here i go again, talking about my dream man.
If i theoretically had to put an iv back in what do I need to do?
Got into the physics lab with my student id, hooked up over break when school was closed. I regret no payments for tuition.
Im gonna take a shit then figure out how to be better at basketball
So I pull up to an apartment complex and immediately felt like I was here to get stoned.
I'm trying to make sure he doesn't drown in the toilet. Because I'm a nice lady.
Is it weird that my ex and the dude I'm talking to now both only have one testicle? Apparently I've found my type..
He wants to buy us a microwave. Clearly the man is going to fix my life.
we should start a freak-out-the-cashier-contest. I just bought JerseyShore Season2, red high heels, and nipple soothing pads
he said "GREAT SCOTT" as he was cumming.
You can come over but I have to warn you that it is naked Sunday.
Randomize
