I'm really tired of cleaning up my twitter the morning after
i would think by now you'd realize that my penis does whatever the fuck it wants and i have no control over the situation
My sink just fell out of the wall. I can't deal with this right now
just got off the metro to throw up and got back on like it ain't no thang
really making moves this morning i see
Just spent the last three hours in the library successfully refreshing facebook
Just erased 'masturbate' from my mental To-Do list because I've got too much stuff to do. I hate adulthood
I am too hungover to address any of this right now, every time i move it feels like i'm being bitch slapped by the hand of God
You grabbed her hand and started jacking her finger off. She was horrified.
Did it finish?
My chin is breaking out a bit and feels all itchy and burny like I'm allergic to something. Are you using a new lotion on your balls?
Perfect. Let's do that. I'm thinking everclear and green dye as our base. We shud start from there
That shot was terrible
You were like one of those guys at carnivals that spit out fire..... Except it was throw up
He played with my boobs the whole time we watched Scott Pilgrim and then started invited others to play with them too. It reminded me of how my mom gives out my french fries without asking.
Showed up 15 minutes late and curtsied when I entered the door if that puts perspective to how my first day is going
i sent him a nude and he responded 6 hours later
what did he say?
"oh m god,,, whow '!!!!nm"
Look don't ask questions just know that one thing led to another and I have a shot glass stuck in my ass. I need your help!!!
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