I had a dream last night that I was the one that killed Biggie
this coming from the guy that still thinks "pulling out" is a good form of birth control? just walk away
Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
Lets get really high and only speak Spanish to each other again tonight
Listen, I'm 30. If it doesnt involve a super soaker and some chicken wings, you can count me out.
Getting up at 8 this morning to drink could be the best and the worst idea we've ever had
We must be getting old. All of our friends are having kids and they aren't illegitimate.
Just woke up. My philosophy paper is a play, and my paper for musical theater is about physics. That's some dank shit you sold me
They woke me up at 6am and made me drink a bottle pf champagne yelling "champagne breakfast!"
Im drinking in homer but I guess Egan got arrestest on an "assault by water ballon" charge but tom actually threw the water balloon in question at the bartender.
This place smells like bottom shelf liquor and broken dreams
Hey, so, you were my "one phone call" last night... Thanks for not picking up. See, this is why I never call you.
Great sex, the promise of us mixing our excellent genetics in the future, and access to drugs are mainly what's holding this relationship together at the moment
Reasons why I'm always right: I am older, I am wiser, I have a larger penis
I'm the one who said we should take things slow. I'm also the one who forced him into the back on my car so we could have sex.
Randomize
