Why do girls always cry at the bar?
What's the point of going out if you're going to cry all night?
Are they having an exestensial crisis at the bar?
You can't date a girl from every country.
I'm the captain planet of women
There is an old man sitting across from me. Phone rang and his ringtone is children giggling, I'm not safe here.
he burped in my vagina and tried to deny it...
Definitely contact high. Thirty miles an hour listening too i can see clearly now wanting too eat the steering wheel
A homeless man walked up to me at the bar, pointed, and told me to get my shit together. Jesus?
Midnight run for medical supplies ended several hours later with a lapdance to the Braveheart soundtrack.
hey dude come in here and see how much of my beard i can put in my mouth!
Bud light lime after 12 shots of vladdy is like frolickin in a meadow of sweet flavor
i cant believe im seriously wearing his ex girlfriends underwear right now
IDK MAYBE BC I WOKE UP IN AN AIRPORT WITH A ONE WAY TICKET TO LONDON
But no. So do not give him one damn penny. Unless they are in a sock and you are hitting him with it.
Dude I just realized i did a camper walk of shame in front of amish people. I should have asked for cheese and a home made pie to cover it up. Im just lost shopping in amish country nothing to see here
What did the sign say that bob stapled to his ass?
Everything is scary i hate being an adult i hate responsibility tell me a dick joke
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