I am officially out of liquor stores within a 15 mile radius that don't recognize me as soon as I walk in the door.
worst part about day drinking... waking up to george lopez
and she just brought her bike into the shower with her
She was throwing my stuff away and then before I knew it she was sucking my dick. It was like some fucked up sour patch kids commercial
Im pretty sure that girl just said "Im taking you home even if your girlfriend has to come too." Why are we here again?
I dont think I should be allowed to pick my own boyfriends anymore
So that 100 days of sobriety thing I told you about last week? Lasted all of 4 days. Fuck it, life's too short
I'm just gonna go with where the wind takes me. if it takes me to his dick, so be it.
he wouldnt let me in bed until i took off all the stickers i was covered in
If there's one thing I learned yesterday, it's that if I really wanted to I could be mayor of Toronto.
Is there one of me peeing? If so do I look bangable in it
She is either doing really drawn out crunches or trying to sniff her boobs...She's lying on her back with her hand behind her head, forcing her head into the cleavage that's ok to expose and then moves her head back and then does it again.
It really hurts to walk. Any idea what happened to my hip?
btw...it's noon and i'm sitting here drinking wine and eating pixie stix. I really need to find something to do...
I'm going to get him a gold star sticker and put it on his dick
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