Im not sure if he just tripped or was star gazing, but i gave him head anyway.
Finally jerked of with a banana peel.
I had forgotten what it was like to go to all four classes. It's exhausting.
i feel like his penis is a security blanet. i cant fall asleep unless its in my hand
I think you blew our chances when you yelled "YOU SLUTS COMING TO THE TITTIE BAR?" in their face
I really think we need to get on this Charlie Sheen bandwagon
we're stoned watching those roller coaster simulators w our hands up screaming on our couch
My only regret is that we didn't pee on our neighbors Prius
I just want to know what horrible accidents of evolution allowed that tiny penis to exist
This is how my night is going so far. The bartender bought our last two rounds and I'm chasing a bee around the bar with a foam bat.
I wish I could remember her name, I mean we fucked and all, but it woulda been nice to tag her in the instagram pics.
I would like to apologize once again for rubbing your thigh with my hands and face for a very long time last night.
Use "feeling words"
Yay
This morning was so rough I can't even. I was cutting up vegetables for my omelet on the floor. THE FLOOR. I sat on the floor because I felt like I was gonna vom.
If he's gonna send me dick pics; he should at least zoom in to make it look bigger.
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