Well I thought that next 8 ball would either kill us or turn us into Gods
the young, male pastor of my church has a jesus fish tramp-stamp. I made him show me.
We can get Dustin to help us. I think he'd be good at luring girls into a dark alley.
No shame. Just smoked a bowl with a Norwegian. Feels like something to cross off a list.
Today in psych we learned that you are a whore.
Me specifically?
Yep.
just bought 2000 rhinestones and a heart shaped stencil at Micheals...I think the cashier knows i'm Vajazzling
Pretty sure that drunken football on the back porch with 6 guys with a champagne bottle was a bad idea....
I'm pretty sure we got the cab driver deported
The smoke alarm went off as soon as we opened the closet.
did i try to light ur hair on fire with a sparkler at the club saturday?
I like to balance the number of cups of coffee to bong rips in the morning before work.
Is it related to planting your seed? Cause I don't know if you have studied the development of a tiny human, but that is some complicated shit.
Isn't everything in a man's life somehow related to him planting his seed?
You're fucking beautiful as shit and we should have loving sex...
I used the light from the first guy's text notification to be able to snapchat the second guy in the dark. I am too good at juggling guys.
You wouldnt listen to us when we told you there was no place that was selling girlscout cookies at 4:30am...
Randomize
