That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
so I have this game called 14 beers left. and we both have to drink 7 before we leave
I'm so high I just tried to eat a hair tie thinking it was one of my pretzels.
I understand why you refuse to be sober now
This is one of those situations that make me think to myself "what life decision did I make to get here"
It was tug of war between me and the cop. He wanted the beer, I wanted the coozie.
I can't help but be optimistic. I'm like a ball of slutty sunshine.
while i was sleeping he changed my screen saver to his dick with a heart frame around it. I just might be falling in love.
I'm laying here in fetal position. I feel like a traffic cone
I cant believe they held hands while getting simultaneous bjs
No dude I got way too drunk to function. 90% sure I tried to FaceTime 911.
He may not be fully over his current wife yet. But wait until I show him my tits in his office at the end of the day tonight.
Dude for real though, we gotta stop getting hammered and kissing gay guys.
You are cut off. Your giant penis and crazy awesome sex is ruining my body...
Jesus christos I come home and am treated like my vagina is made of gold
Either that or it dispenses candy
Randomize
