Anything that's based on a blow job I'm in favor of.
I don't know if you realize how depressing it is to get your card denied....when you're only spending $4.
Its the Friday before break. There are 20 kids in my 300 person lecture hall. All with the same what the fuck am I doing here look on there face.
I think call of duty has replaced my masturbating. And I'm alright with that.
That would explain his violent outburst while watching barefoot contessa...
You don't forget tits like those, even if you are vegas drunk.
Wtf just happened. Thought you were in my bed since 3am, turned out I was sharing it w/a drunk girl from the 6th floor lounge...
That commercial was clearly aspirational. I think Arbor Mist would pair nicely with Oscar Meyer
That idiot. I'll see him on campus and he'll try and touch me like we're friends or some shit. 1.you're ugly 2. You dropped the blunt in the pool
I can't thank you enough for the well-timed blowjob. What a huge improvement in my outlook on the day.
You guys had reggaeton music playing while dry humping? Definition of romance.
I went out to have a smoke, and next thing I know, he's got me bent over a picnic table praying to deities I don't believe in. You should have been there.
My friend asked me if I got home okay and I replied "Glad teat. Goodnight." Usually I can translate drunk me, but I'm even lost on that one.
I possibly am a tad bit not really but maybe slightly intoxicated.
I always knew ther was a reason why we're best friends
Obvs our love of drugs
I like to think of it more as our love of curiosity
Randomize
