remember when she hit me with her car by accident, well apparently it wasn't an accident.
Your tits are I can't wait for
Remember, sex is not sex til both people cross the finish line. Until then, it is just a favor.
so they made cookies with their faces printed on them...I ate jaime...she tasted like poop
just watched a girl laugh at her own fingers... it's not even noon...
so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
Washing the last semen-stained shirt you have really solidifies a breakup. It just got real.
Nothing says walk of shame better than a onesie and a 12 pack of corona..
She basically needs a man who will never act up and take all of her shit
I'm even having trouble finding a guy who's taller than me with no unibrow.. someone needs to tell her its time to lower her standards
IM A SHIT SUOW THE GUYS AT THE PMACR TOLD ME AJDBO I WEBF RO WALNARY WITH OU SHOES! I WASHT LLOWES FLOWERSA
I'm about to punish you for sending me a Snapchat of your boyfriend's morning wood
After what I experienced at 6am this morning, all I can say is chew your noodles thoroughly.
I was proudly and successfully the first girl ever to get kicked out of a the bar for being too drunk last night. Loving spring break.
Hey, I left a taco in your dishwasher.
OH MY GOD YOU GUYS I JUST FOUND OUT I HAD PHONE SEX THE OTHER NIGHT
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