i wish there were pregnant emoticons
you probably should not have drank the wine that everyone spits out. and the sad part, that was not even your low point last night
he is so annoying
so stop sleeping with him
yeah but he is so hot when i'm drunk
I just want to do a slip-and-slide into a giant pool of jello shots right now.
We're watching a video in class about cheese. The scoring for it sounds like that of a Lifetime movie. My mind is creative. I've continued my own story in my head of a wheel of cheese that was raped and murdered. It's so sad. I hope they get the guy. Btw, the video is about marketing.
Might as well permanently tattoo lush somewhere on my body and show it to people when I decide to drink so they won't serve me.
So did you grab that log full of poison ivy for the fire and then apparently take a piss on Saturday night too or was that just me?
will we ever learn or are we destined for a life of poison ivy covered balls?
You are the tramp this city needs, but not the one it deserves.
I'm at the point where I'm more upset that he got to keep my bottle of Fireball than that he stopped talking to me with no explanation
Aaaaand my mom is wearing jeggings...
So for St Paddys day I colored my junk green and got a little hat for him....wanna see it before I sober up....
Also, I wish we had magnetic nipple rings and our boobs stuck together.
Def don't remember taking those pics I sent you...but it looks like I was in a car? Shit. Looks like my Uber passenger rating just went up exponentially.
Literally had sex in his grow room under a plant.. ganja queen .
Just got a handjob in my psych lecture. You were right, going to class is paying off.
Randomize
