Wow that girl who lives a couple houses down is going out wearing butterfly wings a skirt and fishnets
I got wasted for the 1st time and I sat in a fridge for 2 hours and a trash can?
i hate that you can chart my weight gain through my facebook pictures.
After she threw up on my floor she started singing "this is why I'm hot."
i found a beer bottle on top of the urinal, peed in it and put it back... if anyone gets drunk enough to fall for it they deserve it
I refuse to have another spring break doomed by pregnancy.
I just got checked out by a paramedic whilst their sirens were on. I'm doing something right
This morning I got out of bed 4 HOURS LATE, made eggs with a plastic beach shovel, and then ate them using pens like chopsticks in my bed with my turtle. Obviously, I am not in the mood to be proactive with my life today...
So how was your new years? Did u ride a horse at 3am in zero degree weather? Because I sure did
If my mom's not going to offer me drugs then it's really pointless for me to be here.
You had me on my knees catching cheese balls in my mouth and moaning. In front of all your friends.
Oh hell no my vagina is on that screenshot
I have no concept of chastity or moderation, she is a Catholic guilt poster child, how could I not try to hit that
Okay first of all fuck you and everything you stand for because Taco Bell is amazing.
so i fell out of a tree on the ave last night. someone told me there was alcohol at the top. bastards.
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