3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
so my aunt is sitting on the couch, eating a brownie and watching the biggest loser saying how it's not that hard to eat healthy
man i love america
so i was eating a special k bar this morning for breakfast and started choking on it so i reached into my bag for water turns out it was liquor.
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
she sucked my dick to get the taste of the last guy's out. I need to find a new friend with benefits.
Next time he asks to wax your nipple while you're passed out I promise I'll be sober enough to intervene.
I just don't understand how we smoked the EXACT same thing and I feel fine but Tim's over here serenading his fifth bowl of fruit loops with Elton John's entire discography.
we came into the house to find you doing shots by your self and when we told you to stop you locked yourself in the bathroom...
did I at least say anything...
you meowed at us and said you're a cat and cats drink for a living
As pissed as she was, you would've thought I was trying to get back into his pants instead of his booze collection.
Easter bunny might get some gnarly munches and not even have enought candy left to hand out
But on the plus side, what he lacked in size he made up for with speed. And grunting.
you were angry and didn't have anything else to throw so you threw a breakfast burrito...?
You were dancing to the Bee Gees, at 3am, with a piece of ham on your head. Moral of the story, You can't drink.
I don't know why this person would ask for help. It sounds pretty OK to me. Also, I'd steal those bagpipes.
So I hung out with an australian but woke up with a British man in my bed does that make me culturalized
Randomize
