I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
He smothers me through text. I can't even image what he'd be like in person.
Hemmingway ran to paris to avoid going to the university of illinois and becoming a doctor. It was there he developed a drinking problem. I need a plane ticket.
I'm eating tomato paste and drinking banana juice that is expired. Can we please get groceries tonight?
Just calculated that for my last final tomorrow I need 120% to improve my grade and 53% to keep it..buying 30 packs now, go get dressed
Found crayons in my cigarette pack. I can't help but feel you may be responcible.
I'll probably regret it tomorrow. But right now, accepting this $2000 credit card so that I can finance booty calls from across the united states sounds like a golden idea.
I kindof just wanted to go downstairs and let his dad know how good his son was at sex
Either I'm deep cleaning my apartment out of severe academic procrastination or I'm subconsciously nesting and need to take a pregnancy test.
Hey, the point is, I have 3 guys to fuck to get over the last one. It's my golden rule. You told me to find a hobby! It translated as "find another guy".
That is the opposite way I told you to find a hobby.
your sister totally cock blocked me last night don't even think about inviting her to taco night
I wonder if a fish could survive in vodka
I could
Sorry I sent you a video of a singing reverend last night, I was really high.
SCOTCH AND CIGARS AT THE TITTY BAR. YOU ARE COMING WITH US.
If he flies out here I will sleep with him. I have morals, but not when it comes to southern accents
Randomize
