I just feng shui'd our living room furniture. You may be mad in the morning
make sure to take notes today. there is a guy in a wheelchair who might be getting a DUI from a cop on horseback. I'm gonna see this through.
This was worse than the time that I shot a bald eagle.
I'm in new territory... I've never had to convince a guy to let me give him head as an apology.
Oh God! I'm naked from the waist down playing records. Too drunk. I don't even know what to do.
Balls out but with a shirt on. Eating ravioli. I don't know how to deal with this.
I'm currently making some changes in my life. If you don't hear from me anymore, then you're probably one of them. Or I'm dead.
Don't linger or you will get sucked into spending the night. Remember the mission mantra: GET OFF
He ripped off his socks and ran around the basement barefoot. His feet turned black. Then he chugged Parmesan cheese. He chugged dry cheese dude.
I mean I sucked his dick at 3 AM... UNDERWATER. I think I have earned a follow back on twitter.
the only thing you said was do the helicopter dick
hes like bread. how could bread be dangeous
Just want to let you know thanks for setting the bar pretty low when it comes to girls.
Your level of morning after guilt is too much right now. Do less.
Pretty sure my first birthday present will be a pic of an 18-year-old's cock. And I am OK with that
He fed me Girl Scout cookies while I was still tied up...what did I do right?
Randomize
