Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
New discovery: doing the Helen Keller is not as attractive as I thought it would be, in reference to the sex noises.
chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
In case you were wondering, you weren't dreaming. I really did get stuck between my bed and the wall last night.
birth control should be required to get into college
I just remembered yelling "they're gonna let me be a lawyer! Me! Why would they do that?"
I've been meaning to ask you. The first night in the city did we do key bumps with a suicidal homeless man? My memory is fuzzy
I think I pulled my groin stumbling back from the bar. That or the hippo I woke up next to.
i think he saw me take a picture of his dick
id one day like to live in a world full of emotionless and wonderfully fullfilling sex...
Her instagram is literally selfies, cats, and guys she's fucked.
We almost got stabbed in the nuts last night. Don't worry, we're alright.
No he doesn’t answer my texts except for like on New Year’s Because like I was fucked up on New Year’s and he said happy new year and I told him the same and I called him dragonslayer and you can’t really recover from that
I know right, I would blow him just for the satisfaction he would taste like vodka
Come on in and take your pants off
Randomize
