The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
I am dying of drunk and no thats not a typo.
May have just accidentally purchased an iphone on Kate's credit card. This has potential to be bad.
Emee failed...She used my genitals as a tampon
do people really wait til 5 oclock to start drinking in real life?
Im about to shotgun a beer using my mother's knitting needles. home sweet home.
I've hit an all time low of asking baristas what would go good with marshmallow vodka. I think I might hire one to party with all of us. To make hangover drinks
Bring fortys. we have the duct tape. its onnn mothafuckaaaa
I'm dealing with this like an adult, cupcakes and beer.
Tell me again your tentative move date. There are 5 Russians in my apartment on ecstasy and they are having a rave in my living room. I can't. I need to move stat
Why do I have "apologize to Dave Coulier" written on my hand?
I don't intentionally mean to ruin relationships for personal gain but. Yeah nah I totally do.
Just got the test results back; apparently I'm red-green colorblind. this explains the past 18 years of my life and i'm wondering why i didn't realize this sooner
I haven't listened to news as I've been having lesbian sex all night. Anything new?
Last night I had a dream that a man with an ice cream body entered a bicycle throwing contest and won.
Randomize
