she smelled like a LAN party
I spent all night sexting your girlfriend for you because you were too drunk. You're welcome.
as if moving home wasnt embarassing enough, mom picked up my laundry while i was gone. guess who needs to find a new hiding spot for his cum towel..this guy.
it got awkward when she realized that our nickname for her was "The Hambeast"
Did I show you my penis last night?
Can't a girl send out a 4 pm booty call anymore
Pretty sure the shower sex fucked up my hip alignment... im walking like im 104 today
Well once I told her I had a girlfriend she actually got more aggressive. Then Danielle called me and she saw the pic of the two of us on my phone and immediately said "can my caller I'd pic be me sitting on your face" wtf?
Every time you visit for the weekend I end up having to bleach my entire house after.
I seriously doubt I'm gonna be able to properly put your dick in my mouth whilst upside down, but I'm willing to give it my best shot
We popped the air mattress last night via sex and we just kept going but it feels like I have a bruise on every vertebrae
LMAO. Stop. Men are such gentleman these days. I woke up with no one beside me and you got 6 cents
6 cents and no orgasm 💃🏻🎉
We are so blessed
Every time Brady gets sacked I cum a little...
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
My hairdresser won’t do keratin treatments because of the toxins, but will put ecstasy up her butt at festivals...
Randomize
