I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
its officail im naming my first born child brickbreaker
Superbowl and Mardi Gras a week apart. World's longest bender here I come.
she made a facebook for her toddler.. his likes include lil wayne and ice luge. He has more friends than i do. I mean, Seriously? there's not enough booze in the world to make thanksgiveing bearable
I think I sprained my soul last night
I was scared that I should know him but I was too busy blacking out to remember
I'm unsure as to how you were able to snapchat me with your hands duck taped to beer, but I appreciated it nonetheless.
Oh my fucking god how fucking embarrassing never again will I mix drugs at a family barbecue
You went in the back with her.. And honestly I couldn't tell her neck from her tits man..
I repeat do not go to a jail visit drunk, those stools are easy to fall off.
I've faked every orgasm I've ever had, I think I can fake being sick for 8 hours.
Just found an airplane bottle of whiskey and I didn't put it in my coffee. I think I deserve a little recognition this morning.
I'M NOT EVEN STOPPING FOR WINE SO I CAN GET TO THAT DICK QUICKER.
I'm still trying to figure out who shit on the coffee table. I have confirmed beyond a reasonable doubt that it wasn't me.
She grabbed the other one and started playing tug-o-war against the blonde chick. I told you getting my nipples pierced was a good idea
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