It was kinda weird being the boss
Did you feel like Tony Danza?
we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
I don't know what's more sad: The fact that he fingered the side of my leg, or the fact that the side of my leg feels like a vagina.
I woke up in my girlfriends bed with another guy laying next to me. wtf.
Sometimes I send them texts like "I want to make you cry and lick up your tears" just to fuck with them. And THAT is how you get rid of a Stage 5 clinger.
3 months til "no sober october" start prepping now. i cant have you bitch out on me halfway through like last year.
He had to carry me to the car. But then sat with me and waited for me to sober up enough to have sex. He's a keeper.
I guess I'll just chalk it up as a learning experience and a lot of great sex.
Of course it may just be the context. A dish of dog food would look lovely next to your breasts.
He asked me if I remembered touching his police badge. awk.
My goal is to be drunk before we even get out of the No Wake Zone.
I've lost every trace of self esteem. Even sneaking a BJ in the coffee room has lost it's luster.
You're the best thing in my life, followed closely by cannabis and trashy romance novels
Sometimes, being an adult means buying a bottle of whiskey after work and live tweeting the commercial breaks on food network.
Would you say that skipping class and sitting alone in my room singing One Direction to myself and sobbing is an acceptable way to deal with the break-up
Randomize
