She called it mighty mouse.. And from there it was down hill
That bad?
Full length cargo pants, running shoes, and a partial unibrow. Alcohol really is blinding.
They had half off shots during the fourth quarter. I was powerless.
please dont make me drink to the titanic soundtrack
he keeps trying to sext me and all I can do is respond with descriptions of what im eating.
I CRIED after phone sex. Am I gay?
Do to my newly discovered condition I'm having to resort to emergency beat sessions to avoid the temptation to text girls I know are easy slams.
Makes sense. My grandma just did this shot. MY FAMILY KICKS ASS.
i dont get why youre mad at me. i promised you he looked like jim morrison and you failed to ask me like which era
I have bruises from doing the splits on the poles, if that doesn't scream bourbon street regret then I don't know what does
If last night was a preview of 2015, I quit.
The fact he has had a girlfriend for 5 years and they are trying to work it out isn’t going to stop me from sleeping with him. He said it himself you can’t cheat on someone you love...
I miss my innocence.
I miss being able to say, "I've never done this before."
The longer the dick, the closer to Jesus when you’re on top.
You've got the chocolate, drugs and my pants. You hold all the cards...
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