were talking about masturbation in my pysc class. He says it's healthy. I'm gonna live forever
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
it was literally the size of a crayloa marker. i didnt know what to do with it so i just sat there
It' a whole new level of walk of shame. I'm carrying his sheets since I have a washer/dryer.
This will be amazing. Plus he's going to do a line of cocaine off of the other guy's ass.
He referred to his cock as "The cock" like it was third party or something.
shes the kind of girl that would cock block endangered pandas
You invited the cop in for a "Celebrity shot"
Either your boy toy or the kid who pulled a knife on me in high school is here
He said it was fake. Like really? Hey baby, I wanna sleep with you, so here's a picture of a fake tiny dick
I was thirsty after the sex and it was a long trek back to res so naturally I stole chocolate milk from his fridge as I left
Just fell off my bed trying to pose and take a nude for you. Probably broke my wrist
I just want to slap everyone in the face that's happy being sober. Loser.
He called out my ex's name during sex.
Alex is a pretty common unisex name.
It was the same Alex. I asked.
Like I said, all hypothetical...unless, of course, you'd be into that. My heart may skip a beat.
Randomize
