I want to stick my p in your. b.
did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
what did you hear about me?
that you are a very nice girl and a pleasure to be around
that was hard to say and not laugh
I've had more sex in the two weeks since we broke up than I ever had in any two weeks we were together.
someone who i have in my phone as thundercock just said he was DTF
not saying it was a bad idea to throw an impromptu party but someone stole the microwave
Sorry about giving you those ripped gym shorts after my dog ate your pants, but after the awkard BJ incident I didn't plan on hearing from you again
the cops are being surprisingly chill about david hanging from a tree with no pants.
i would compare it to sliding down a velcro-covered fireman's pole naked. no more bearded men for me.
That's what you get for doing kinky shit with a guy that lives in his moms basement.
I was just asked by a police officer to not come back to Lancaster...
I opened my eyes to the dog snorting coke, I decided it was best to just close my eyes and forget what I saw
thought i saw a dude in a kilt yesterday, but then i realized he was doing a walk of shame. happy st. paddy's day.
if anyone breaks out the olive oil & slip n slide, text me 911.
I woke up with what has to be a whole pack of smarties loose in my bra. Was that your fault?
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