just do him I won't tell jon
um i'm guessing you meant to send this to tina, thanks for the support in our relationship you whore
someone took a shit in my car last night and left $5 on the seat...
He kept asking me to take off my bra and I sat up so he could. He fumbled with it for a few minutes and when I sighed and went to undo it he goes, "Yeah, you got this."
Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
just saw an anti-abortion rally outside of the courthouse...so naturally i tossed them out a coat hanger i found in my car
I'm fucked up. I can't drink anymore. We stole a cat.
That makes the second boyfriend of hers that I've fucked. I'm gonna start keeping an eye on every guy she even speaks to. Girl is my sexual rabbit's foot.
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
I feel like getting drunk at the airport is sort of a rite of passage into adulthood, but maybe i should reserve that occasion for a flight thats not just 1 hr
I picked up a chick last night on crutches wearing a I am boobman tshirt. I love raves.
Let's run into the wild and just eat berries and have sex all the time.
trust me. coming from a bonafide dirtbag, this dude is up to shady shit
Also, if he asks how he's doing orally I can probably ask if we're exchanging Christmas presents?
He posted a picture from Senor Frogs. I don't remember where that bikini came from and my sombrero is PERPENDICULAR. Safe to say it was one hell of a day
We started a fund for a baby in a wine glass, I think we're pretty responsible.
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