She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
people would bow to what i just did to her vagina
but i have a bet that her boyfriend is going to try and deflower her tonight so i better get a move on if i want to videotape it
I got used. This is the happiest day of my life. I was just a huge cock and that is all she needed.
I dont know if you relize this but ive been high ly medicated in my room for a whil now. GOing out into the real world would make me li ke tom ha nks. im not ready to be tom hanks..
One of us will probably end up wearing nothing but glow/ neon body paint and a pair of water wings...
And I am in no way ashamed to say that it will most likely be me. I'm hoping for it actually.
My face feels like its stuck between a ball sack and an asshole.
The only thing stopping me from having sex with you in my parents jacuzzi bathtub is the knowledge that they've already had that idea themselves
You told me my blanket felt like ground beef.
I have no inclination to even want to think about what God's existential meltdown is going to be like. O.o
So we are in the middle of sex and his brother knocks on the door and says "dude I just wanted to know if you want to see the fish I got tonight"
Fucking suck it up and drink your feelings like a normal human being.
I dont even know what happened i just remember waking up with beer cans outlining my body...
Dude how about today while I was on lunch someone died in the break room at work....I didn't even know we had a break room!!
I'm gonna have to start putting baby wipes and a change of pants in my bag. The amount of times I'm scared of shitting my pants in public is too high and I need the reassurance
Randomize
