if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
ok watching intervention on tv. when i hit rock bottom - i wanna be THIS chick.
All I remember was yelling at him, "Its becasue of people like you that it took us so long to get to the moon!"
so apparently the car got towed with me passed out in the back seat.
You drank everything last night. It was like this huge deconstructed long island that went on for 5 hours
Im covered in vodka and melted gummys. Fuck summer.
Just woke up in his bed wearing only his shoes. I don't know how to gently say hey dude get the fuck up and take me home....regardless these are some nice shoes.
A kid in my class today just asked if we have class on the 17th, then announced that he couldn't go anyways because it was the day after his 21 and he was going to be too hungover
Going to be a long day. text me later. Sorry I puked in your sink.
Don't be surprised if I hand out mini dildos on Halloween
Goddamn it Peter ur the only person i know who can make going down on a girl a competition.
She won. Twice.
Do you know that you can buy Cialis in Mexico? Best. Honeymoon. Ever.
I forgot her safe word. It was a rough night.
we got cupcakes after we fucked. gives a whole new meaning to sugar daddy
I saw that he had a tattoo of a map of New Jersey on his arm, so i slowed down to like 20mph and pushed him out of the car
Randomize
