New pre-game routine....wal-mart bathrooms...quality beers for free...hallelujah
I just wanted to let you know that this afternoon I took a piss at the same toliet you drank out of on New Years Eve.
I plan on gettn treatment center drunk
Hu mahhiw im so tired.i just got done. In fo dleepu. Aaaaaaahh. I qisj my mom filmed me. In axtunf so funny
You defs just slept for 6 hours in a porta pottie. You should probably just kill yourself.
You kept saying,"there's a seahorse in my stomach, who's trying escape". This was after the curtains attacked you.
He just tagged everyone he's slept with this year in a 'memories of 2011' tweet
I just looked at a girl and was like what disease does she have? And then my mind caught up ohhh shes pregnant.
He's scared I want a relationship? How does texting him at three am and sleeping with four of my exes symbolize that?
I mean honestly, what would you have done?
Not screw her in the church house?
Almost stopped showering halfway through to go get food
I was so drunk, he put me to bed and went down stairs to hang out with his friends. Apparently, I was curled up in the closet, spooning the dresser when he came back up.
I'm not gonna plow a chick in front of her 14 year old brother....
I’ve officially bought the ticket for my future dick appointment 😂
Bud light made chelada as a breakfast for those of us with class at 8 am
Randomize
