yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
This was all being yelled across a beer pong table as all important things should be discussed
Whats the count minus fat chicks?
There are regrets in my world today- mostly jager at that fucking altitude
Every pair of shorts I try on makes me look like some kind of powerful lesbian wizard.
That is like, the point of shorts
I know this is really fun but I don't wanna glow anymore
HOLD ONTO YOUR PANTIES AND SAY GOODBYE TO THE REMAINDER OF YOUR INTEGRITY
YOU BETTER NOT BE SHAVING YOUR LEGS RIGHT NOW IM TRYING TO HELP YOU
Man I sound like a slutty Mormon
look, im sorry that i yelled at your little brother, threw my car keys at him and smashed a stale cookie with a pool cue, but i swear to god i didn't poop on the floor. it was one of your dogs.
I seriously feel like I just crawled out from under a shit covered rock. I'm NEVER drinking like that again...well, not for alteast a solid 3 hours.
I was told i took a shot doing a headstand in the backseat then proceeded to barf all over my face
I had no idea you were so talented.
I woke up to find I still had sequins under my tits. I'd say Sunday was a success.
Met this british guy. Played pool. Broke into an apartment and had sex
I watched my wife kick balloons while wearing thigh highs. It's not a sentence you get to use too often
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