So... how did lowering your standards work out last night?
Don't say that out loud. People might think I really like to pee on you.
Of course you don't like it. I am the one who likes it.
I need to get skinnier so that I know when pregnancy scares are real...
hey tell your friend im sorry for licking his mouth, that was probably inappropriate
I'll reiterate. Best drinking game ever. I shall teach it to my children's children
Just watched an entire Mariachi band walk of shame home together. Halloween at its finest
I got punched in the face by a Cowboy last night. Then he bought me a beer cause o convinced security not to kick him out the bar. Start of a fairytale love story? I think so.
I was screaming out for people to gather the townsmen and the mayor so we could hang him
He showed me a picture of his baby hamsters and I called them "Mammal McNuggets"
Ramen still too hot to eat. Eating it anyway. Stoner girls feel no pain
Besides you're a Tennessee fan and it'd be against my religion to have your penis inside me today.
My housemates are judging me because I'm high at 8am and making Spongebob shaped Mac and Cheese
They know nothing, John Stoned.
REMEBER. We are young, horny, and poor. If someone wants to give us alcohol... TAKE. IT.
outside on the street drinkin, walked into a random house and asked to pee, some kid hands me a beer and says i have to chug it first
He weighed maybe 130, his dick had to be 30 of it. SO BIIIIG.
Randomize
