Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
I called her the wrong name twice and she still called me back this morning. DO I still wait two days to call her back?
Sometimes I think its so cool that a dick that has been inside kate moss has also been inside me. So exciting.
but she was nice to me.
She was a fuckin STRIPPER.
well we are all hammered and my parents are reminiscing about all the times they drove us home drunk from Christmas
I was born in the year of the cock... How fitting.
his genitalia just looks like a thumbs up. a really really small thumbs up.
Slurping strawberries throug a straw. It feels like the kool-aid man is coming in my mouth.
I don't want to get into details but it feels like there was a bear mauling involved. A very good bear mauling.
ill give you food and tequilla and penis and joy
Every bathroom has like throw up and like bagels in it. Richie didn't even have bagels.
When you put my balls in your mouth i just want to buy you expensive gifts...you know what i mean?
Last time I checked he was house sitting for his ex while she was out of town with some new dude. He was crying about how the guy told him to stay out of his whiskey while he was gone. That's whipped
Okay so I've been talking to the mice again and they agree with me that you're a piece of shit.
I just realized I'm having shark week, during shark week.
Randomize
