I'm not to broken up about it. Our relationship was worse than a coldplay song.
I'm so never shaving my vag in a target bathroom for him again.
i woke up to my roommate spraying cooking spray on my legs. fourth time this has happened. not cool.
After what u did to that bathroom I think the $30 and the "sorry I'm a jackass" note was the thing to do.
I am willing to take shots of vanilla extract. That's how this night has been.
DIN'T JUSGE NE.
Look, as a friend I'm asking to see a picture of his tiny dick
Haha jealous. If I could remember my dreams I'm pretty sure they would constantly be about being drunk in foreign countries
I just saw a fat girl roll down the steps taking out three people with her, thought you should know.....
I lost the back to your old name tag last night in a girls shirt. It got me a view of some titties though, I guess in some way you're still doing your brotherly deeds
It all started because he put my damn phone in his pants. By his crotch nonetheless.
I am stoned at Disneyland with my little brother. It's gonna be a good day.
He started tongueing his parfait and told "thats what I'd to your ass" in the middle of Starbucks. Of course i brought him home
Why do I always end up with closet ICP fans?
It's my birthday weekend! I'm getting a Brazilian and he's going to fucking Arkansas. Where the fuck are his priorities?
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