you could tell him that chauvinism doesn't go very well with his gay homemade tank top
in mid cry she says "I can be a whore if I want to"
dude literally just took me 4 trips to take out the recycling from last night. we need to have parties like this more often
So i closed my laptop as i started to fall off my bed and then i caught myself and realized that moment of catching myself is the difference between tuesday and friday.
We got back together. The pastures weren't greener on the other side, the dicks were just smaller
I really want to lead this Amish guy into temptation
It's all fun and games until some random starts jerking it on the deck.
Some kid just stopped wherever he was walking, turned to me, and gave me a slow clap. So I'm pretty sure my walk of shame beats yours.
If I wear a tail on Halloween, how am I supposed to grind? Maybe I will just wear devil horns
This strange Italian man told me he wants to take me for ice cream and kept calling me "tomato" from tinder
You declared that afternoon sex will be referred to as "wet naps" from now on
I gave him the white girl "you spilled my psl look" and walked away
If you break up with me one more time it's over.
Can I come over and get it in, take a nap in ur bed, grab some poptarts and then leave?
You haven't lost that air of class about you...
I just licked honey off my own tit. Is there anything about that which doesn't SCREAM single???
Randomize
