GM filed for bankruptcy, all the dealerships closed, and it's june and I'm in jeans and a sweatshirt and I'm cold. What is the point of living in this state anymore?
Ever since he's come out, my facebook stalking experience has gotten uncomfortable
Would it be cruel if i sold xanax instead of adderall to freshman unfamiliar to the drug-taking profession?
The voicemail says i shouldn't bother ever showing my face there again, i don't understand
We visited your boss last night. guess you wont be paying the rent this month, eh?
Last time i was there we saw the window of the pizza place we were at get busted, we were pulled out of a taxi to be questioned by the cops, and we peed outside a waffle house. I'm in.
He asked her to marry him and she said yes. There is NO WAY she knows about his penchant for wearing lingerie.
I think cutting a patient out of a owl costume is a first for those guys. It's a good story at least.
We accept all of your sexual lovers, Jewish, episcopalian, atheist. Dick is dick
You yelled "Everybody!!! Round of applause to Jill for not doing anal!!" Right in front of him.
Let's drink lean at the 5 seconds of summer concert. Give the teens a glimpse into their future as dysfunctional adults holding desperately onto their youth. You in?
I still have to bake cookies and shave my legs so Mike can have MILF & cookies when he gets home.
I'm officially disproving the fact that a hoe never gets cold bc this hoe is COLD.
you told me you wanted to be a soccer mom with a high tolerance then you put the bottle to your face
you woke up this morning in a laundry basket, only wearing rainboots.
apparently ive been in a long term relationship for the past 1 1/2 years w/ out knowing
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