should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
There is so much to learn about oneself from autofill.
She is chewing on staples and spitting them at her cat, I think it's time to leave..
EVERYONE CAN HEAR YOU FUCKING YOU ARE IN A TENT
I am not going to ask my mother to pause a movie so I can have phone sex.
Also while I am being the bigger person I plan on bringing over something strong smelling and/or alcoholic to torture the poor hungover bastard
Let me be the 15% helpful, 85% useless as shit angel on your shoulder.
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
Yup. Dog walker, house sitter and mistress to the rich, bored and bi-curious. I've got a nice little operation running.
Right when he asked me if I was on birth control my dad walked in. This is my fate.
Got home and told boyfriend what happened. He was like "you made out with a guy you call Balls Deep?" and hi-fived me.
Would I be crazy if I drove 1,000 miles for some dick? What mile does it become ridiculous?
Too bad I can't un-pee in his body wash
She's the queen of dating. She managed to get a date with a guy who saw her puke five times in two hours.
Btw, the reason I have a black eye is bc I needed to puke so hard yesterday morning; I whipped up the toilet seat so fast that I railed myself in the face. Then spent the rest of the day more carefully puking. Kind of why I'm not in the mood for drinking.
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