8:17pm: So, How was fun day?
1:15am: So I just woke up in my bed in my bathing suit... I don't remember getting into bed or dinner or anything after slip n slide that happened around five... I'd say fun day was a success
I've been thinking and really it's a miracle I haven't had an STD yet.
no seriously. she's even got the premier of the real L word on her calendar at work. that lesbian.
then he tried to convert me to islam
where did this taco bell managers name tag come from ?
There is a guy dressed as Captain America in the theatre. I want to make out with him even though I have no idea what he looks like. Wish me luck, I'm going in.
Just did a drug deal on the toy aisle at walmart, Merry Christmas
theres a new barista at starbuck holy fuck she's hot
i want to face-plant into her vagina
Rick Santorum just suspended his campaign. Lets celebrate by watching gay pornography together.
I have officially tracked lube all over our house on the bottom of my socks without knowing it. Don't slip when you come in
I consented to having my finger branded. How was your night?
I wish you could take over my body and feel what my nipple feels like right now
I got Pilsbury cinnamon rolls for us to have tomorrow, but I don't have the willpower to leave them in my fridge overnight, so I am eating them all and getting us more in the morning
I love you more by the minute
Apparently when your theatre teacher asks who the best actor of our time is, Nicolas Cage is not the right answer.
NOT PREGNANT HIGH FIVE!
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