This chick, for whatever reason, has serious "Leave your wife and kids and also break up her young marriage in order to frolick for a good 2 weeks before I realize that she's just like the rest of them and I made a huge mistake and ruined a lot of lives in the process" potential. It's SO INTRIGUING.
i'm in the sorta mood where i wanna be that crying, drunk girl who will hook up with anyone that tells her she's pretty
doing shots has become such a natural thing to me that i just instinctively swallowed listerine
I just had a flashback to last nights party, I'm pretty sure I told most of the people there that I post a masturbation schedule for an iCal download.
drunk lawn darts. Let's test the homeowners policy
quick, send me a pic of a fat chick eating ice cream in a bikini. no joke, no questions, just do it.
I am ina trunk. Iam in a trunnnnnjkk. I hope its yours. Oh manomanomano. Thids better be your trunk
Its kind of weird knowing that im only seeing you that day to fuck in some woods
i was really disappointed no one would drink beer from our cleavage last night except for us
I AM AT THE LOUNGE WHERE THEY FILMED THE LAP DANCE IN SHOWGIRLS....IT IS AMAZING
I just want it to be said that I had sex in my Belle dress last night. Classy motherfucker.
Went up to some dude that hit on Laura and told him he has a voice like a grandma. Apparently didnt have muscles or kindness like grandma so can you pick me up at the ER please?
And when were you going to tell me to stop dancing on his coffee table singing "come on irene?"
Dude, don't beat around the bush. We're fucked and you know it.
I'm about to go get lunchables and alcohol. Take that adulthood
Randomize
