If I'm having a dream where I'm having sex and I can actually feel it between my legs because I've had a lot of it recently, does that make me a whore?
I have a feeling this is a serious question. Problem solve, Jess.. I'm going to let you figure that one out on your own
he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
Seriously, stop peeing all over the toilet seat. It looks like movie theatre butter.
i was so fucked up i thought i was at home depot
I'm functioning at the level of a challenged walrus.
I know it's pride week, but your asshole is just never supposed to taste like banana.
you got me arrested i just think that goes without question you owe me a blowjob
it was all good until he screamed "for fraaannnceee" on his last thrust
I wanna throw up and cum in that order
So ive come to the realization that my affinity for tattooed guys makes me the literal definition of tit for tat
Forced to cancel my booty call due to the snowpocalypse. This crosses the line.
orgy was averted by karaoke, thank god
Interesting. All i can really say is humanoid shaped doritos bags melting very slowly
Finally got with the virgin.
Yeah? Howd that go?
As soon as I got it all the way in, I looked deep into her eyes and said "your soul is mine" in the deepest voice I could make. She was not amused.
I was trying to get nudes from last night and ended up getting a family portrait!
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