it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
She was adopted and used to dance at Sapphire. just my speed.
Sarah Palin is going to have a show on the discovery channel...Can I get a moment of silence for knowledge?
someone just puked in the library. they put up caution tape. i totally underestimated finals week.
Soup is not an acceptable meal before doing that many Jager bombs
i was congratulating myself on not falling down the stairs when i walked into the wall. it's like one step forward, two steps into the fucking wall
If anyone from work finds out about us I will rip your dick off, sew it to your forehead and feed your balls to you like little grapes
Ill give you a 4 hour blow job if you make my nephew go to bed.
My boss just told me not to come back to work if I decide to drink. Challenge accepted.
MAYDAY. glass in foot, have crush on guy with mullet.life is over.
you puked in the bathtub and said "let them pee"
Woohoo! Instead of a pregnancy test you can buy me a burrito
A 'Bear Fight' is a car bomb followed by a Jaeger bomb. Fuckface and I do those on slow days. Tonight, we did a 'Polar Bear on Fire'. Fireball, a bear fight in the middle, and end with rumple minze.
I made friends at the beach bars tonight. Several were worried for my well being.
I shouldn't be allowed to be in america for NYE... or any major holiday for that matter
Flirting with/getting ready to possibly sleep with a married HS classmate and getting added to a bible study group chat within minutes of each other. #Balance
Randomize
