Maryland truck stops are full of people with killer mustaches
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
I said i love rain, just to change the subject, and he said 'id like to do it in the rain'. Dear lord. He doesnt stop
He has an intense fear that my cat will attack his balls while we're fucking
No, she isn't nearly as crazy as the girl who wanted to wear a vial of my semen as a necklace.
Dude tried texting you during but she threw my pants too far away
In local news, attempts to hide phone from extremely drunk self prove unsuccessful for Dallas woman.
This popcorn tastes like salt and regret. It reminds me of the first blowjob I ever gave.
You've ruined popcorn for me.
She knocked me and my drink to the ground with her ass. I have never been mad at someone for having a glorious booty.
you never un-have a 4some
I'M TRYING. TO WATCH. PORN. PLS HAVE UR IMPORTANT DISCUSSIONS ELSEWHERE FUCKERS
Make sure you wash your hands. That seagull you threw was very sick.
So I justmade it back home and was greeted to a squirrel in my dorm... Last time I let my friends rent it out for a party.
i just turned on my printer and found 10 pounds of german chocolate inside. i think i found where you hid your candy last night
Next time I think it’s a good idea to hook up with any of your wife’s family members or friends just kick me in my dick
Randomize