I'm playing the sound guy on a porno set
having sex with you is like teaching a dog to tango, it DOESN'T work
I feel as though I could trust her, I mean she did tell me she was married before we had sex.
Apparently, there is a horrible ghonorrea out break at our school. Woo! What a way for Loyola to welcome us back.
I am the master of subtle flirting. I seduced him by simulating a hand job with an epi-pen during training.
i just remember pinky promising you guys to take care of him.
walk of shame to my ortho appointment. kids are staring. this little girl just asked her mom if she can havr glitter in her hair too.
I'd like to believe that in some alternate universe we are living this wonderful lesbian life together..
She has "Massive Shits" listed as a turn off. That's very specific and there's a story behind it I bet.
Sweet, got a date tomorrow night
Talking to her is like watching "Bad Life Choices: The Movie"
It just smells like spaghetti and despair.
MY DAD KEEPS LIKING PORN LINKS/ALBUMS ON FACEBOOK AND THEY ALL SHOW UP IN MY NEWSFEED
If youre worried about being stabbed, you probably shouldnt be there.
She fucked my eyebrows.. I've never had that done before.
Wait... Plucked, or Fucked?
Fucked, but I understand your need to clarify
I often worry that if I get famous, people from my past will recognize me and start talking to the media
Randomize
