He's on drugs...like drugs for horses.
threw up in my backpack again. Asian guy I cheat from wasn't pleased.
Did i throw a brick at someone last night?
the pic of her and her boyfriend fell off the wall as we were fucking.
May or may not be going home with my jamitor. i'm kiddong, btw, i have no idea. i'll let you know soooon.
I just reached for my seatbelt when I sat down to pee... Might be a little hungover.
A guy wearing a shirt that says "eat shit and die motherfucker" just held open a door for me. He's got manners.
All I want is a guy who will love me and occasionally shave my balls.
He said I act like a cross between a kindergartener and a high 70 year old man. Which is inacurate because it fails to account for the disco obsession.
Was there a condom involved? Because he was saying he wanted a kid. Repeatedly.
Ive fucked up. im like a feral dog rabidly chasing an infrequent dream amidst a cataclysm of disaster
Tomorrow is my favorite texting day of the year... It's where I send every guy I've had sex with this past year a text saying "happy not a Father's Day" and we laugh and I get so much dick it's wonderful.
Went and sat in the wrong fucking class for 30 mins, answering questions and shit. What ever this is i will be on it for the rest of the semester.
the party picked up after I got pretty drunk...I got kicked in the fucking head by a tiny lesbian...she was 5'1" I did not think she could do it...i was very wrong
i just sneezed the second i jizzed and it got in my eye. words can't describe how much i hate life right now.
Randomize
