please pick me up with an explanation of why i shacked in a trailer with a guy who doesnt have a car.
he has cookie breath... dont trust fat people.
hey everyone... booty call? my house tonight. bring friends to fuck my friends.
I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.
My hispanic family watching the world cup is getting too intense for me. a lit candle was just thrown at me because i walked by the tv.
I just got turned down by a drunk fat chick. At my own birthday party. God hates me.
Do you think county jail has a Groupon?
Got into Princeton. So excited about the mommy-issue-over-achieving-cock I get to ride the next 4 years!!!
Apparently I'm short enough to sit on his lap and fuck him while he is driving because the cop didn't notice.
SHUN THE NONBELIEVERS. THUS SAYS THE NIPPLE LORD
you called me drunk last night to talk about summoning sex demons with magic WTF
There is a cooked ham in the washing machine.
I need more than 2 fuckable people this is an outrage
Its like the floor is slow but life is fast?
I see you found the nyquil...
Is there a sexuality term for 'only wants hatefucks'?
Randomize
