I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
When i look at that picture of him, i'm a little proud to be like yeah, his dick was in my mouth saturday no big deal.
It's sad because pictures are supposed to say a thousand words, and theirs just say 'fat'
He kept spanking me and talking about biomedical science.
Aw, you fucked a pre-med? you're moving up in the world!
Bruises. Everywhere. Table sex is dangerous
i wasn't about to bring her gummy handcuffs to her father's funeral
Im trying to find an appropriate gift to your mom for getting both you and your sister on birth control within a week, any suggestions?
Taking a semester off always leads to bad things like having a baby or getting married
apparently putting your t-shirt on your head with a bottle of captain and telling girls your the pirate king of tallahassee doesn't work
think of it as grooming, as if he is my Kate Middleton and I'm grooming him to be a presentable princess
Lol, you asked the waitress to box up someone else's discarded food last night
Did I come home in a police car last night? id come downstairs to ask you but i dont think my legs work anymore
Today is get drunk without showing anyone my penis day
if they didn't want us to do blow at uni, why would they make textbooks so smooth?
Just saw a girl I banged wearing a pro life shirt downtown. Not sure where to start with that.
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