I'm on that like soy sauce on rice
i may or may not be dressed up as my farmville farmer. gonna harvest some ladiesss tonight!!!
he just quoted gucci mane to try and get me to give him head.
The world would have a new energy source if someone would just take a blacklight to the backseat of that slut's car
It's official. Every single female in their late teens and early 20s get their fb statuses from a pool of cliched "quotes" which all say, without saying, "boys treat me like shit, I know they do, but one day I'll find 'the guy' who will treat me right no matter how psychotic I am." Vom.
just watched the video of me leading you with a trail of french fries.
Sudden realization: I dumped him because he was too immature, yet I am the one who moved back into my parent's basement post-breakup.
Look at you go. You're like the Slutty Librarian that Could. They should write children's books about you. Children's books for adults.
I walk in and my mom has a Christian workout program playing. It's like, gospel music with an "electronic" beat to go with it. And then they try to save your soul at the end. I hate being home.
That was when I yelled "Wisconsin powers activate!" and took off sprinting across the ice
I lost Mario kart three times but I got laid so it wasn't the WORST night I've ever had.
It was extremely weird and uncomfortable mid blow job she looks up and says " tell me Simon Cowell makes your dick hard"
I am attempting to break the habit of calling him daddy.
I keep worrying the police are going to come looking for us.
For which one? Starting a fire on my porch or having sex on my porch?
can you come here so we can have really loud sex? the girl upstairs walks so loud i want her to know how it feels
of course
Randomize
