The guy I fucked in the port a poty just called me and asked me on a date!
Awkward!
No he was cute and I said yes!
Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
You were passed out on the chair and when I asked you if you were okay you looked up and said "I'm fine, I was just pretending for a picture" then passed out again.
So I gave him a handjob and now we aren't friends anymore
You're at Notre Dame. What did you expect?
Is it horrible that I want to keep my purple landing strip until after my gyno apt? I feel like someone beside myself should see it...
It's one of the many facets of my drunken alter egos. I'm like substance abuse batman.
by "whatever happens, happens" i meant "we are totally hooking up again on tuesday." i thought that was obvious.
He told me I was 100% better then porn then passed out nto the cake
I`m watching Shallow Hal & Jack Black has better nipples than Jimmy's chick.
You thanked your mom for the gymnastic lessons so you could do a keg stand
but I'm still not sure how you became more and more fluent in Spanish the drunker you got
The night was crazy enough that we did a workout. Instructed by the bouncer at 2am
Actually, lets be honest. I will probably keep calling him the pastor because it brings me joy using pastor and fuck buddy in the same sentence.
Your "whiskey dick" is glorious but also terrifying
Sorry about peeing on your phone last night
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