Are we in a gay sports bar?
So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
dude i just figured out that the tostitos sign is two people eating chips and salsa. being high totally pays off sometimes
thought i was the most hungover person in class until i saw a kid puke into his bookbag...he wins
Thats the last thing I remember and then I woke up in this Dutch kids dorm and he was taking a picture of me while I was sleeping
Acid flashbacks - fact or fiction? Have been seeing a surprising amount of sparkly shit this afternoon...
I can't tell if your life is amazing or needs reevaluation when "did I get hit with a nightstick" is a legitimate question.
You're the only true friend I have, if true friendship is based off who would be there for me at 4am during a boxed wine crisis.
New carpet is nice. I'm making carpet angels. Like a fresh snowfall.
She told me she's into girls now. I told her there would be a full bottle of jäger and an empty bed here Friday.
I just audibly asked myself if i wanted to masturbate.
And then audibly agreed
all the one night stand stories i have end with me crying on my RA's floor stuffing cupcakes into my mouth
Weirdest drunk sex ever. His sweat dripped into my eyeball and then he looked down and asked me why I was crying. I went with it.
I puked on her cat, I think I should at least buy her breakfast
I was too hungover to sit up and pull the curtains closed so I did it with my toes
Randomize
