YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
me and ur bf were arguing about whether coke was vegan. i really hope it's vegan
He kept asking me to take off my bra and I sat up so he could. He fumbled with it for a few minutes and when I sighed and went to undo it he goes, "Yeah, you got this."
I just five second ruled a donut I dropped at starbucks, everyones staring
Hey wes just called me saying he was asleep outside by the pond at my apt complex
They have 12 kegs and 40 bottles of liquor and a pool with a diving board. And hardly anyone at this wedding knows me. Should be a great night
Walked up in time to hear him say "you saw I was in a relationship on facebook? So why are you holding my nuts?" To her. That's loyalty man
Yeah, you went up to him and said "I stare at people until they feel obligated to talk to me."
I think we need to stage an Intervention. Her Instagram is a call for help.
I didn't know White Castle was open when your sober.
Are you serious?! She sent a pizza instead of showing up?!
She did indeed. Papa Johns. It helped because I was super hangry. That bitch is smart!
I have a bottle of rum in my pocket...what does that say about me...
You come prepared
so my dads pretending to use the snow blower and theres absolutley no snow one the ground.... someone should really lock our liqour cabinet
LACE UP YOUR GODDAMN SHOES
N O
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
Randomize